Rising Strong Process
Get back up after failure by owning your story and rewriting the ending
The Rising Strong Process is Brene Brown's research-backed framework for recovering from failure, disappointment, and setbacks. Based on her finding that if we are brave enough often enough, we will fall, the process recognizes that falling is not optional for people who take meaningful risks — but how you get back up determines everything. The process has three stages: The Reckoning (recognizing you are hooked by an emotion and getting curious about it rather than suppressing or offloading it), The Rumble (getting honest about the stories you are telling yourself about what happened, challenging those narratives with facts, and owning your part), and The Revolution (using the insight gained to write a new, braver ending to the story). Brown's research across thousands of interviews revealed that people who rise strong from failure share a specific pattern: they are willing to feel the discomfort of the fall, they are willing to interrogate their own narratives about what happened, and they integrate the lessons into a revised story that makes them more courageous rather than more cautious. The process directly challenges two common but unhealthy responses to failure: numbing the pain (through substances, busyness, or cynicism) and offloading the pain onto others (through blame, rage, or withdrawal). Neither produces growth. The Rising Strong Process produces growth by using failure as data for a more honest, courageous life.
- If we are brave enough often enough, we will fall — falling is the cost of courage
- How we get back up from failure determines the trajectory of our lives and leadership
- The stories we tell ourselves about our failures are often wrong but always powerful
- Owning our story is the bravest thing we will ever do — it is also the path to growth
- Numbing pain or offloading it onto others prevents the growth that failure makes possible
- The Reckoning: Recognize and Get CuriousWhen you experience a setback, failure, or emotional trigger, the first step is recognizing that you have been emotionally hooked. Most people skip this step — they immediately react, suppress, or numb. Instead, pause and get curious about what you are feeling. Name the emotion specifically: not just bad but ashamed, angry, disappointed, or afraid. Brown's research shows that people who can accurately identify their emotions recover faster and more completely than those who suppress or avoid them. Physical awareness helps: notice where you feel the emotion in your body.Pro tipUse the phrase 'I am noticing that I feel...' rather than 'I am angry' or 'I am ashamed.' This creates distance between you and the emotion, making it something to observe rather than something to be consumed by.WarningDo not skip this step by jumping straight to problem-solving. Unprocessed emotions will drive your behavior whether you acknowledge them or not.
- The Rumble: Challenge Your StoryWrite down the story you are telling yourself about what happened — what Brown calls the shitty first draft or SFD. This is the raw, unfiltered narrative your brain constructs to make sense of the failure. It will likely contain assumptions, blame, and confabulations. Then interrogate it: What do I actually know versus what am I making up? What is my part in this? Am I being generous with the other people involved or am I assigning the worst possible motives? The gap between your SFD and reality is where the growth happens. Be willing to own your part without taking on more than your share.Pro tipStart your SFD with the phrase 'The story I am telling myself is...' This framing acknowledges that it is a story, not necessarily the truth, which makes it easier to challenge.WarningThis step requires honesty that can be painful. If the failure involves trauma or abuse, consider doing this work with a therapist rather than alone.
- The Revolution: Write a New EndingUsing the insights from your rumble — the gap between your initial story and the more honest version — write a new ending to the story. This is not about positive spin or toxic optimism. It is about integrating what you learned into a revised narrative that is both more truthful and more courageous. The new ending acknowledges what happened, owns your part, extends appropriate empathy to others involved, and identifies what you will do differently. This revised story becomes the foundation for your next act of courage rather than a reason to retreat.Pro tipThe best new endings include specific commitments about what you will do differently, not just insights about what you learned. Action is what transforms insight into change.
After her TED talk on vulnerability went viral with millions of views, Brown faced intense public criticism and felt exposed in exactly the way her research warned about. She went through the Rising Strong Process herself — recognizing her shame and fear, challenging her story that she never should have given the talk, and writing a new ending that her vulnerability in that moment was exactly what connected with millions of people and furthered her mission.
A product leader whose major launch flopped initially blamed the marketing team and market conditions. Through the Rising Strong Process, she recognized her shame about the failure, challenged her blame narrative to acknowledge that she had ignored early warning signals from customer research, and wrote a new ending that included specific changes to her product development process.
Brown developed the Rising Strong Process after her viral TED talk on vulnerability thrust her into public life and she experienced the inevitable backlash and criticism that comes with visibility. She found herself face-down on the metaphorical arena floor and needed a framework for getting back up. Drawing on two decades of research on vulnerability, courage, shame, and empathy, and interviews with thousands of people about their experiences with failure, she identified the specific pattern that distinguishes people who rise strong from those who stay down or get up but lose something essential in the process. The framework became the core of her book Rising Strong.