INFLUENCEMonths to result

Stalking as a Mate Guarding Strategy

Stalking as a means to retain a mate

Problem it solves

lack of influence

Best for

Understanding the motivations behind stalking behaviors

Not ideal for

Victims of stalking who may find the content triggering

Overview

Why this framework exists

Stalking can be seen as a desperate measure to reunite with a lost lover, often implemented by individuals who perceive themselves as lower in mate value than their ex-partner. This behavior can have severe consequences for the victim, including emotional distress, social isolation, and damage to their reputation.

Core principles

3 total
  1. Stalking can be a means to retain a mate, particularly for individuals who perceive themselves as lower in mate value.
  2. Stalking behaviors can have severe consequences for the victim, including emotional distress and social isolation.
  3. The effectiveness of stalking behaviors can be influenced by factors such as the stalker's persistence and the victim's perception of their own mate value.

Steps

3 steps
  1. Initial Contact
    The stalker initiates contact with the victim, often through repeated phone calls, texts, or in-person visits.
    Pro tipVictims should be cautious of individuals who are overly persistent or aggressive in their attempts to initiate contact.
    WarningStalking behaviors can escalate quickly, and victims should prioritize their safety and well-being.
  2. Establishing a Pattern of Behavior
    The stalker establishes a pattern of behavior, such as showing up at the victim's workplace or home, in an attempt to control or intimidate the victim.
    Pro tipVictims should document any incidents of stalking behavior and report them to the authorities.
    WarningStalkers may become increasingly aggressive or violent if their behaviors are not addressed.
  3. Using Threats or Coercion
    The stalker uses threats or coercion to attempt to control the victim's behavior, such as threatening to harm the victim or their loved ones.
    Pro tipVictims should not engage with the stalker or respond to their threats, and should instead seek support from law enforcement or a crisis hotline.
    WarningStalkers may become increasingly desperate or violent if their threats are not taken seriously.

Checklist

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Examples

2 cases
Jane's Story

Jane's ex-boyfriend posted nude photos of her on a revenge-porn website, leading to a barrage of unwanted attention and harassment.

OutcomeJane suffered severe emotional distress and damage to her reputation, and was eventually forced to seek support from law enforcement and a crisis hotline.
Rebekah Wells' Story

Rebekah Wells was a victim of revenge porn, and founded the organization Women Against Revenge Porn to support other victims.

OutcomeRebekah Wells was able to find justice and support, and is now working to help other victims of revenge porn.

Common mistakes

3 traps
Underestimating the Severity of Stalking Behaviors
Stalking behaviors can be downplayed or minimized, but they can have severe consequences for the victim.
Failing to Document Incidents of Stalking
Victims should document any incidents of stalking behavior, including dates, times, and details of what happened.
Not Seeking Support from Law Enforcement or a Crisis Hotline
Victims should seek support from law enforcement or a crisis hotline, rather than trying to handle the situation on their own.

Origin story

How this framework came to be

The concept of stalking as a mate guarding strategy is rooted in evolutionary psychology, which suggests that individuals may engage in behaviors that increase their chances of retaining a mate, even if those behaviors are harmful or coercive.

Source

Traced to primary
Source · BOOK
When Men Behave Badly The Hidden Roots of Sexual
David M Buss · 2020
Open source →

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