INFLUENCEDays to result

The Barrier to Entry Framework

Create barriers to entry, not exit

Problem it solves

lack of influence

Best for

Couples considering marriage or already married

Not ideal for

Those who are not willing to make a commitment

Overview

Why this framework exists

This framework is about creating barriers to entry, rather than exit, in a marriage. It's about making it more difficult to get into a marriage, rather than making it easier to get out.

Core principles

3 total
  1. Commitment is key to a strong marriage
  2. Creating barriers to entry can help couples think more carefully about their decision to get married
  3. Making it more difficult to get into a marriage can help prevent divorce

Steps

2 steps
  1. Create a barrier to entry
    Make it more difficult to get into a marriage by creating a barrier to entry, such as a waiting period or a test.
    Pro tipBe creative and come up with a barrier that works for you and your partner.
    WarningDon't make the barrier too difficult, or it may prevent you from getting married at all.
  2. Discuss the barrier with your partner
    Talk to your partner about the barrier you have created and make sure you are both on the same page.
    Pro tipBe open and honest with each other about your concerns and fears.
    WarningDon't assume that your partner will agree with the barrier - be prepared to compromise.

Checklist

Saved in your browser

Examples

1 cases
The couple who created a waiting period

A couple created a waiting period of 6 months before getting married, which gave them time to think carefully about their decision and make sure they were fully committed to each other.

OutcomeThe couple was able to create a strong and committed marriage.

Common mistakes

1 traps
Not creating a barrier to entry
If you don't create a barrier to entry, you may not be able to prevent divorce or make your marriage more committed.

Origin story

How this framework came to be

The idea for this framework came from James Sexton's observation that many couples get married without fully considering the commitment they are making. He realized that creating barriers to entry could help couples think more carefully about their decision to get married.

Source

Traced to primary
Source · PODCAST
Contracts of Love & Money That Make or Break Relationships | James Sexton
Andrew Huberman · 2025
Open source →

Related frameworks

Browse all Influence →