MINDSETMonths to result

The Law of Validation

Validate others to gain influence

Problem it solves

limiting beliefs

Best for

Those who want to build strong relationships and gain influence over others

Not ideal for

Those who are not willing to put in the time and effort to understand and validate others

Overview

Why this framework exists

The Law of Validation is about understanding the deep-seated need for validation that exists within every human being. By recognizing and catering to this need, you can gain influence and power over others. This law is based on the idea that people are more likely to be receptive to your ideas and requests if they feel seen, heard, and validated.

Core principles

3 total
  1. People have a deep-seated need for validation and recognition.
  2. Validation is a powerful tool for gaining influence and power over others.
  3. To validate others, you must be willing to listen and understand their needs and desires.

Steps

3 steps
  1. Step back and assume an inferior position
    To validate others, you must be willing to step back and assume an inferior position. This means listening more than you talk and asking for advice and guidance.
    Pro tipAsk open-ended questions to encourage others to share their thoughts and ideas.
    WarningBe careful not to come across as insincere or manipulative.
  2. Mirror back the other person's values and opinions
    To build a strong connection with others, you must be willing to mirror back their values and opinions. This means showing genuine interest and enthusiasm for their ideas and perspectives.
    Pro tipUse active listening skills to show that you are fully engaged and interested in the conversation.
    WarningBe careful not to mirror back negative or toxic behaviors.
  3. Do favors for others without asking for anything in return
    To build trust and credibility with others, you must be willing to do favors for them without asking for anything in return. This means being generous and willing to help others without expecting something in return.
    Pro tipLook for opportunities to help others in small ways, such as offering advice or making introductions.
    WarningBe careful not to overextend yourself or compromise your own values and boundaries.

Checklist

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Examples

2 cases
Lyndon Johnson's rise to power in the Senate

Lyndon Johnson's rise to power in the Senate is a classic example of the Law of Validation in action. By validating and catering to the needs of others, Johnson was able to build a strong network of allies and gain influence over others.

OutcomeJohnson's use of the Law of Validation helped him to become one of the most powerful men in the Senate.
A business owner who uses the Law of Validation to build strong relationships with customers

A business owner who uses the Law of Validation to build strong relationships with customers is more likely to succeed than one who does not. By listening to customers and validating their needs and desires, the business owner can build trust and credibility.

OutcomeThe business owner's use of the Law of Validation helps to increase customer loyalty and retention.

Common mistakes

3 traps
Being too self-absorbed and focused on your own needs and desires
When you are too self-absorbed and focused on your own needs and desires, you can come across as insincere or manipulative. This can damage your relationships and reputation.
Not being willing to listen and understand others
When you are not willing to listen and understand others, you can come across as arrogant or dismissive. This can damage your relationships and reputation.
Not being genuine and authentic in your interactions with others
When you are not genuine and authentic in your interactions with others, you can come across as insincere or manipulative. This can damage your relationships and reputation.

Origin story

How this framework came to be

This law is illustrated through the story of Lyndon Johnson, who rose to power in the Senate by validating and catering to the needs of others. By doing so, he was able to build a strong network of allies and gain influence over others.

Source

Traced to primary
Source · BOOK
Robert Greene 2 Books Collection Set (The Laws of Human
Robert Greene · 2018
Open source →

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