Mate Guarding and Mate Poaching
Strategies for protecting and acquiring mates
This framework explores the strategies used to protect and acquire mates, including mate guarding and mate poaching behaviors.
- Mate guarding is a key component of relationship maintenance, as it allows individuals to protect their mates from rivals.
- Mate poaching is a key component of mate acquisition, as it allows individuals to acquire new mates.
- Both mate guarding and mate poaching can involve coercive or manipulative behaviors, which can damage the relationship and the partner's well-being.
- Identify potential rivalsDetermine whether there are potential rivals for the mate, such as a partner's interest in someone else.Pro tipConsider the cultural context and the partner's mate value when evaluating the threat.WarningBe aware of the potential for biased perceptions and overestimation of the threat.
- Deploy mate guarding strategiesUse tactics such as vigilance, possessiveness, and emotional manipulation to protect the mate from rivals.Pro tipBe aware of the potential for deception and coercion, and consider the partner's motivations.WarningBe cautious not to overstep boundaries or engage in coercive behaviors.
- Deploy mate poaching strategiesUse tactics such as flirting, charming, and manipulating to acquire a new mate.Pro tipBe aware of the potential for deception and coercion, and consider the partner's motivations.WarningBe cautious not to engage in coercive or manipulative behaviors, as these can damage the relationship and the partner's well-being.
The man's mate guarding
A man may become possessive and controlling when he suspects that his partner is interested in someone else.
OutcomeThe man's mate guarding illustrates the importance of considering the potential for deception and coercion when protecting a mate.
The woman's mate poaching
A woman may use flirting and charming behaviors to acquire a new mate, such as a friend's partner.
OutcomeThe woman's mate poaching illustrates the importance of considering the potential for deception and coercion when acquiring a new mate.
Overestimating the threat
Overestimating the threat can lead to unnecessary mate guarding or mate poaching behaviors, which can damage the relationship.
Underestimating the threat
Underestimating the threat can lead to complacency and a lack of preparedness for potential relationship threats.
Using coercive behaviors
Using coercive behaviors, such as violence or emotional manipulation, can damage the relationship and the partner's well-being.
The framework is based on research by David M Buss and others, who have studied the role of mate guarding and mate poaching in human relationships.
Source · BOOK
When Men Behave Badly The Hidden Roots of Sexual