COMMUNICATIONWeeks to result

Positive Action Language

Requesting concrete actions

Problem it solves

poor communication

Best for

Individuals and groups seeking to improve their communication skills

Not ideal for

Those who prefer indirect or passive-aggressive communication

Overview

Why this framework exists

Positive Action Language is a framework for making requests in a clear and concrete manner. It involves specifying what we want others to do, rather than making vague or abstract demands. This approach helps to avoid misunderstandings and promotes more effective communication.

Core principles

3 total
  1. Requests should be specific and concrete
  2. Requests should be focused on what we want others to do, rather than what we don't want them to do
  3. Requests should be made in a clear and respectful manner

Steps

3 steps
  1. Identify what you want
    Clearly define what you want others to do or provide. Be specific and concrete in your request.
    Pro tipUse positive language to focus on what you want, rather than what you don't want
    WarningAvoid making vague or abstract requests that may be open to interpretation
  2. Use positive action language
    Frame your request in a positive and concrete way, focusing on what you want others to do. Avoid using negative language or making demands.
    Pro tipUse specific examples or scenarios to illustrate what you want
    WarningBe aware of your tone and body language, as these can impact how your request is received
  3. Be open to feedback and clarification
    Be willing to listen to others and clarify your request if necessary. Be open to feedback and suggestions for improvement.
    Pro tipUse active listening skills to ensure you understand the other person's perspective
    WarningAvoid becoming defensive or dismissive if others don't immediately understand or agree with your request

Checklist

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Examples

2 cases
Requesting help with a task

A person asks a colleague to help with a project, specifying exactly what they need help with and how they can contribute.

OutcomeThe colleague understands the request and is able to provide the necessary help.
Requesting a change in behavior

A person asks a family member to stop leaving their dirty dishes in the sink, specifying how this behavior is impacting them and what they would like to see changed.

OutcomeThe family member understands the request and makes an effort to change their behavior.

Common mistakes

3 traps
Making vague requests
Failing to specify what you want others to do can lead to misunderstandings and confusion.
Using negative language
Focusing on what you don't want rather than what you do want can lead to defensiveness and conflict.
Not being open to feedback
Failing to listen to others and clarify your request can lead to misunderstandings and unfulfilled needs.

Origin story

How this framework came to be

The concept of Positive Action Language was developed by Marshall Rosenberg as part of his Nonviolent Communication approach. It is based on the idea that clear and specific requests are more likely to be understood and fulfilled than vague or ambiguous ones.

Source

Traced to primary
Source · BOOK
Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life
Marshall B. Rosenberg · 2015
Open source →