The Wrong Spotting Framework
Understanding and Overcoming Defensiveness
The Wrong Spotting Framework recognizes that feedback often arrives with generic labels and that receivers tend to focus on what's wrong with the feedback rather than trying to understand it. This framework provides a structure for understanding and overcoming defensiveness in feedback conversations.
- Feedback often arrives with generic labels that lack content.
- Receivers tend to focus on what's wrong with the feedback rather than trying to understand it.
- Understanding is job one in feedback conversations.
- Recognize the Tendency to Focus on What's WrongAcknowledge that receivers tend to focus on what's wrong with the feedback rather than trying to understand it.Pro tipUse self-reflection to recognize this tendency in yourself.WarningFailing to recognize this tendency can lead to defensiveness and decreased effectiveness in feedback conversations.
- Shift from 'That's Wrong' to 'Tell Me More'Instead of focusing on what's wrong with the feedback, try to understand it by asking questions and seeking clarification.Pro tipUse open-ended questions to encourage the giver to provide more information.WarningFailing to shift from 'that's wrong' to 'tell me more' can lead to defensiveness and decreased effectiveness in feedback conversations.
- Understand the FeedbackTake the time to understand the feedback, rather than simply reacting to it.Pro tipUse active listening skills to ensure understanding.WarningFailing to understand the feedback can lead to defensiveness and decreased effectiveness in feedback conversations.
Holly receives feedback from Irwin that she is too enmeshed in the personal lives of clients. Holly becomes defensive and focuses on what's wrong with the feedback rather than trying to understand it.
The framework is based on the idea that feedback is often imperfect and that receivers tend to focus on what's wrong with it rather than trying to understand it. By recognizing this tendency, individuals and organizations can take steps to overcome defensiveness and improve feedback conversations.